Today is Isaac’s first day or pre-K and consequentially, in my book at least, it officially marks the end of summer. No more lazy days at the pool, spending most of the day in PJs, or the all-too-familiar chorus of “I don’t know what to do!” No ma’am, today it’s back to our regular routine (Can you hear all the angels in heaven singing!?). Since Zachary’s school starts earlier than Isaac’s, that means the last two weeks have left Isaac without his usual playmate, and he has vacillated between having to be okay with entertaining himself and begging me to play games with him.
The other day, I put the laundry on hold and joined him in a game of hide-and-seek. Do you even know a child in the universe who doesn’t like hide-and-seek? Really, the most simple of concepts, there’s something exhilarating about the thrill of both seeking the one who is hidden and waiting nervously to be found.
“Count to twenty, Mommy,” I’m instructed, which I do while he runs off to find some place where he secretly hopes I’ll find him quickly. “One, two three….” I call out each number loud enough for him to hear me throughout the house. Most of the time I can hear his scurrying and muffled giggles as he searches for just the right spot. “Ready or not, here I come!” I declare as I rise from my position in front of the couch and go in search of my tow-headed four-year-old. “Is he in here?” I ask as I pull back curtains, open doors, and look in cabinets, announcing my approach at every turn. And then I spot him, usually half-hidden beside a bed or behind a chair, his nose poking out to see if I’m getting close. He squeals in delight that I have found him and races back to the living room to trade places and become the seeker. And of course, I obediently leave the room to find a creative place to hide my 35 year-old body that isn’t quite as tiny as his.
Now, please understand, our house is not that big, and in most cases my hiding spots are not truly all that clever, but in many cases I settle into my hiding spot only to wait. And wait. And wait some more. Isaac will walk into the room where I am and fail to look behind the door, open the curtain, or glance behind the chair. He will merely sweep the room with his eyes, and when he does not see me, he leaves, convinced I am surely not in that room. After two whole minutes searching he cries, “Mommy! Where are you??” He wants it to be easy and gives up when it gets hard.
A day or so later I was reading in Jeremiah 29. Verse 13 says, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Verse 14 promises, “I will be found by you.” I was struck by the idea that seeking involves effort. God is not hiding where we are hopeless to find Him, but He is waiting for us to exert ourselves more than just a cursory glance around the room. When we are eagerly looking for something, we will stop at nothing until it is found.
I have stood in the guest room closet countless times just waiting for Isaac to pull back the door. I have even cracked it a bit ( a small clue!) only to watch him walk around the room in vain, leaving without considering every possible hiding place. I wonder if this is how God feels sometimes as He watches us go through life on our own. “Seek me!!” He beckons us, but we give up too quickly. We are too often distracted by others that call to us, things that appeal to our senses or promise the fulfillment we don’t even realize we desperately crave. Matthew 6:33 says, “Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you” (HCSB). When we choose to seek Him first, He changes the way we see. The things of this world no longer hold the same appeal as they once did. Our desires begin to change and with them, our actions. But it requires perseverance. It is a steady determination to not give up, even when it’s hard.
For me, it means turning off the TV, putting down social media, closing the book or magazine, or setting my alarm a little bit earlier. It’s a conscious choice to set my mind on Him. Not always an easy one, but a good one. The BEST one. And I can honestly tell you that when I have intentionally chosen to seek Him with all my heart, to hunker down and peel back every possible layer, He has faithfully been found by me. When I have decided to draw near to Him, even if I didn’t feel like it, He has lovingly drawn near to me too, and it is so satisfying. He answers prayers, gives direction, provides comfort and peace. He is not a God far off that we cannot know Him, but sometimes He is patiently waiting for us to open the closet door and choose to draw near because we desperately want Him with all of our hearts.
How can you be intentional TODAY to draw near to Him? What practical things have you done in your life to help you make this a priority, and how has God changed your desires as a result?